Rebekah Sanderlin

Writer & Marketing Strategist (Screenwriter, Journalist, Speechwriter, Copywriter)

Service Member's Branch - Army

Service Member's Status - Retiree - 26 years

What has been your military spouse career/entrepreneur journey so far?

I was a journalist when I met and married my husband and continued working full time as a journalist up until our first child was born in 2004. But, my husband deployed to Afghanistan when the baby was just two weeks old and it quickly became apparent that I would not be going back to work full time when my parental leave ended. My husband was gone, we had no family or friends nearby to help with the baby, and there were no daycares in town open past 5:30 pm–there was no way for me to make it work. I supposed that's when my entrepreneur journey started because that's when I started working as a freelance writer. Since then, I've had a number of freelance/work from home positions, in journalism, communications, and marketing

Tell us about yourself.

My name is Rebekah and I live in Virginia Beach, though I'm originally from Nashville, TN. My husband retired from the Army 4 years ago after serving 26 years, and I was married to him for most of that time. We have 3 children and I'm a writer whose career began in journalism and has changed over the years to now include various aspects of marketing as well as creative pursuits in screenwriting fiction writing.

Tell us about a "typical" day in your professional life.

I've been a work-from-home freelancer since my first child was born 21 years ago, a necessity to accommodate my husband's many deployments–so my days probably look a little different than most people's! I get up and scroll through my emails, news digests, and social media accounts while I drink coffee and get the kids off to school. Then I ride my Peloton for 30 minutes, more or less depending on my mood, then shower and get dressed for the day. I usually sit down at my desk around 10:00 or 11:00 am for video calls or to work on work or school assignments. Most days I eat lunch at home, but once a week I try to leave the house for lunch with a friend. I also try to run errands during the middle of the day when stores are quieter. I come back to work for a few more hours and see my kids when they get home. I'm in school right now, so three days a week I'm in class in the evenings–usually from 4:00 to 7:00 pm. I come home and eat dinner with the family and, if I still have more work to do or I'm working with a west coast team, I'll sit down at my desk for another hour or two. If not, I'll join my husband for a glass of wine on the front porch. Because I don't have set hours, I tend to work on weekends–but I really don't mind! I'd much rather have flexibility throughout the week. It's a pretty great life, in my opinion!

What has been your biggest military spouse career struggle and how did you overcome it?

My biggest struggle was believing that my career was important. My husband was in Army Special Forces (Green Berets) and spent much of our marriage deployed to dangerous places. A lot of his friends were killed and he and most of his friends were injured. The stakes absolutely could not have been higher for his career–it was literally life and death, every day–and that made my career seem inconsequential, and my need for a career seemed selfish. And yet... I don't think I really accepted the importance of my own career until my husband retired from the Army and my income provided us with the economic security our family needed while my husband figured out what he wanted to do for his "second act." Not only were we able to pay our bills, he didn't have to just accept the first job he was offered. He was able to take some time to explore his options and start his own business. He wouldn't have been able to do that if I hadn't been earning decent money, and I wouldn't have been able to do that if I hadn't invested in my own career during all those years when doing so felt silly and selfish.

What role did mentors and sponsors play in your journey?

I have always had mentors–even people who may not have realized that I thought of them that way! I believe mentorships can be formalized, organized relationships–and I had a wonderful mentorship through American Corporate Partners when I changed industries. But I have also had many, many friendships with people who provided me with career advice and guidance (like Sue!). I guess the role all of those people played was to pave over some of the potholes in my road so that I would have smoother passage.

How does your career path differ from what you imagined for yourself?

Truthfully, all I ever wanted to be was a writer, and I'm a writer now. I've explored many styles of writing professionally that I never imagined I would do, but I think that was just my own lack of imagination. I have the career I always wanted and I feel extremely blessed to earn a living as a writer.

How did military life (PCSing, deployments, trainings, etc) factor into your career decisions?

Ha! How did it not?! I could talk about this for HOURS! In short, I haven't had a full time job since 2004 because of the military lifestyle. I parented three children through 20 deployments and four big PCS moves. Freelance/Entrepreneur/Work from home has been the ONLY way I could have a career.

What resources have you found to be useful in your career/entrepreneur journey?

Personal and professional networks; flexibility; and wifi ;-)

If you and/or your spouse have transitioned from active duty to your current status, what resource or tool did you find to be the most helpful?

We did transition all wrong! My husband decided to retire at the very start of COVID lockdown and, because he was an E-9 and there were rumors of a stop loss, all of the normal retirement process requirements were waived for him. He met with an Army retirement counselor once and all the counselor said, "If you think you want to retire, you have to do it this week because we don't know what's going to happen with COVID." He came home that day and told me that the next day would be his last day in the Army–after 26 years of service! He put on his uniform one more time and then that was it... we didn't have access to the normal resources and tools because of COVID. The truth is, I still don't even know what they are.

Final word: what are your top tips for other military spouses about navigating a career within the military lifestyle?

For active duty spouses, I'd say that 1) it's vital to always keep a toe in your industry, even if that means working for free. It's too easy for a "career break" to turn into a "career end" and technology changes fast. If you let yourself fall too far behind, you may never catch up. So, look for jobs that will keep you relevant and connected to your industry–even if it means taking a different role, or accepting a lower salary. 2) Don't worry about your resume. You don't have to write it traditionally or chronologically! It's meant to be a story of what you're capable of–so think of it that way! My resume is not a list of jobs I've had (and I joke that I've had more careers than Barbie!); it's a story of my capabilities–and like most military spouses, I'm capable of a lot! 3) Learn to work in and maximize the margins. If, like me, the military casts a huge shadow over your life and little kids eat up most of what's left, look for ways to work in the extra minutes that life provides. (I wrote an entire screenplay while sitting at my son's soccer practice! I've written speeches for some of the world's most successful CEOs at my kitchen table while dinner was cooking!) For veterans' spouses, I'd say: CARPE DIEM! Truly, seize the day! No one is ever going to tap you on the shoulder and say, "It's your time now," so this is me saying it to you: THIS IS YOUR TIME! Be greedy with it. Stop pushing yourself to the side. If there's something you want to do, do it now and do not apologize for it. You are not the best supporting actress in someone else's drama; you're the main star.

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